About Infernal Combustion

In 1999 or so, after The Onion was a thing but before most other internet satire had swum out of its ancestors' nutsacks, Infernal Combustion was created by two bored nerds in Toledo, Ohio.  Keith Bergman and Mark Tinta achieved what was then a mind-boggling amount of fame and notoriety for sharp, socially relevant and piquant articles like "Dio Quits Dio" and "Limp Bizkit Singer Gets Lost In Pants."

The site garnered attention from members of Kiss, Anthrax, Metallica, several newspapers and literary agents, and was briefly sponsored and hosted by Roadrunner Records, before health issues and a growing sadness over making zero dollars for their work led Keith and Mark to abandon the site in 2004.  

Now it's 2017, and after 13 years of contempt for the idea of restarting the stupid thing, Keith (now a similarly unsuccessful comedian and writer) has decided to put this up and see what happens.  Expect a mix of new stories and classics from the archives, if it gets updated at all.  Seriously.  Zero expectations.  You toolbags bitch and complain about your free ha-ha's like you did last time and I'll shit on your front stoop.

Thanks for giving a shit if you do.  Also, yes, we're aware that The Hard Times exists.  Fuck off.